Five Reasons You Should Trust Your Childs Teacher

Many parents only talk to their children’s teacher if there is a problem or on open school night.  We love seeing you then but it may be better if we talked to parents on a more regular basis.  One day I was talking to a group of teachers and a thought occurred to me.  We were talking about our past “lives.” I found out that quite a few were not career teachers.  They came from other industries. They still had contact in their previous industries and relevant information.  Information their students could use.  I have often told my students to talk to their teachers for career advice.  They will be surprised at what they will find.  As the years went on I realized that students and parents can learn many things from teachers.  Think about the ideas below.

 

Free or inexpensive activities for children. Museum free nights – yep, some museums have an evening where admission is free. Shows, fairs, art classes, exhibits, movie screenings that are free or inexpensive.

 

Extra academic tips for your kids.  As we have been watching your child academically all year.  We should have our finger on the pulse of how they are doing.  We can recommend learning games, tutoring opportunities, or activities that parents can use to help their child gain an academic edge.

 

How to navigate through the school system if you have an issue.

We can let you know of any trouble on the horizon that your child may soon encounter. It could be the negative influence of another student or where a child can get any kind of help physically, emotionally or socially through the school system.

 

Gives your child the impression that education is important and so is he/she.

Parents should always stress the importance of a good education and how important a child is in general.  When the teacher reinforces these ideals, the child realizes he/she is investing in him/herself.  This encourages the educational experience to be a positive one.  The child will be motivated to excel and push to do their best.  They will see the value of the investment and feel like they can actually be “all that they can be.”  They can make choices about their futures and live passionately not just a day-to-day existence.

 

Unchain Your Brain

Katy Beers, The Cleveland, Ohio three, and Elizabeth Fritzl have one thing in common.  They were all locked away in basements or dungeons for a long period of time, physically, emotionally, and sexually abused.  They were held hostage by sick individuals with a twisted agenda.

It also makes me think about people around us who are not bound by physical ropes or chains in basements but who are bound by limiting beliefs.  Beliefs that keep them chained to untruths about their world or ideas they have about themselves.  Limiting ideas that can cripple or even destroy a person.  I know it sounds dramatic but the wrong thought definitely can imprison a person and doom them to a life of lack luster dissatisfaction.  Especially when we see how we are being hauled and pulled by society’s ills.

I had a particularly challenging day with my students last week.  I spent practically the whole weekend trying to figure out what went wrong.  While I was doing that I missed an invitation to a museum outing, dinner with some friends, a playful tumble with my cat, or inviting some friends over for movie night.  If I had found a nourishing distraction, my weekend would have been more relaxing and I would have felt more energized by Monday.

 My mind really was not ready for that kind of “self-reflection.”  Sometimes you have to let go of that process and put boundaries around your psyche.  Self-reflection is ok when you are in an open frame of mind.  When you can see the whole picture as it really is and not when your inner vision is poor.  

So next time I/you have a challenging day, don’t give in to it.  Get a nourishing distraction and live in the moment.  When you are in a more relaxed frame of mind you can tackle the problem….objectively.  Protect your psyche at all costs.  Many people depend on you.  Love yourself unconditionally.  See it for what it is, learn from it and move on.  Life is too short.  You have people to see and love to give and fun to have.  Many times you will find that the problem was not with you but some other extenuating circumstance that you could not control.  Or everybody knew there was a problem from the beginning, everybody but you.

 

So unchain your brain from the negative voices that tell you woulda, shoulda, coulda.  You are a competent and strong child of God.  Always surround yourself with people who support who you are and remember that you are the creator of your universe.  You control who is in your world, what behaviors you will deal with, and how far and fast you want to move.  Move around with love, faith, and confidence.                                                                

sigrid

What We Can Learn From The NFL Bullying Case

 

Watching the NFL bullying case is quiet puzzling.  This issue has been in the public eye for over a week and we still do not know exactly what happened.  Everybody knows what bulling is.    Even if you make a mean face at a toddler they will feel…..bullied.

 It does not matter if the bully is bigger than the victim, smaller than the victim, another race, religion, culture or of another socioeconomic class.  It is still bad in the eyes of the public.   What I find most interesting is that now the NFL is trying to distance itself from the situation.  They have turned to blame the victim.  They are saying if the victim felt threatened he should have stopped the unwanted behaviors.  I guess we can say the same thing to our children.  If you are being bullied, you can do something to stop it.  Remember, the children are watching how we handle situations.  Some people forget that bullying is wrong and society should not tolerate it at any level.  I see some people think that locker room behavior is there to toughen up the athlete.  The toughen-up advice is a cop out for an organization or a parent who does not want to take responsibility for the bully’s behavior.  That is the wrong message to send to  children who are watching the adults behaving badly.   

We also know that someone who exposes bullying can experience backlash from their coming forward.  On the playground the child can become a target for sneak attacks or isolation.  In the workplace it is no different.  A police officer who reports unprofessional behavior can be given the worst or most dangerous beat with no backup.  A teacher can be given a class with severe problems and receive no support from administration.  A nurse can be given a multitude of gravely ill patients, compromising patient care.  The list can go on.  From children to adults can be bullied in many ways.  So far we really don’t know exactly what happened with these two football players.  The details are still foggy.  The ways they, the NFL, are acting, it seems like they have something to hide.  Everybody against the victim makes people suspicious.  Any kind of hazing should not be condoned. Sport’s is a business. It should be look upon and treated as such.  The NFL or any organization should always seek to be professional.  Treat everybody with respect and dignity. Do not tolerate bad behavior and people will not be as willing to behave disrespectfully.  All we can do is watch the situation and hope they work it out quickly.  They have to remember that the children are watching, observing, and learning how the adult world works. 

 

Let’s Hear it for Building Traditions

 

When I was a child we would bake cookies with my mom.  Sometimes we would bake for the holidays, or sometimes just to give us something to do.  We would be so excited as my mom pulled out the baking utensils and ingredients. My sibling and I would start talking about our specific creations.  What would make our cookies different from any other cookie.  Mom was always so organized.   We loved helping out.  She baked from scratch.  I did not know what a treat that was.  She would call us together and each sibling would be assigned a task.  No task was too big or small.  Mom would have a multitude of “baking extras” around so we could be creative.   Sprinkles of different colors and textures, butterscotch or chocolate ships, vanilla, oatmeal, different color raisins, different kinds of nuts, marsh mellows, chopped up fruit, candies you can put in the cookies – all kinds of things.  In the end we could decorate the cookies according to our tastes.  We talked about our creations and if there was anything on our minds, we talked about it then.  Sometimes, the cookies came out funny looking but they always tasted good.  In the end I did not know what was really happening.  We were building traditions.  My brothers and sisters remember these times fondly.  It had a profound effect on us.  It still gives all of us joy to think of those times.  So, next time you have a few minutes do something and start a tradition.  It will keep you together and last forever.

The Future, what Future?

1940’s futuristic picture

2000’s futuristic picture

I was always fascinated by the advertising ads from the 1940’s through the 1960’s. They would show what the future would look like.  Technology was being pushed as one manifestation of mankind’s greatness.  We would have it working for us throughout our lives.  The family unit would be strong and we would be happy.  Now fast forward to the 2000’s.  Look at the news and advertising today.  I see fear being pushed.  I was talking to a group of kindergarten students a few years ago.  We were talking about the planetary bodies.  It was a great conversation at first.  Then one student brought up that she heard the sun will explode and we will all die.  I notice a morbidity creeping into the conversations with kids.  I see on television, radio, magazines, books, and of course the Internet talk about a doomed financial future.   Pollution, GMO’s, ramdom acts of violence, the proclamation that an extensive security systems will keep you safe, getting inoculated against the latest diseases or else.  The vanishing middle class is being pushed in our faces at every turn.   People seem to be getting sicker.  We see geopolitical changes in the world that are a threat to mankind’s future.  Killer weather destroying lives and property.  A government for the people by the people being replaced with government for Wall Street by Wall Street.  The list can go on.  I notice everybody is on edge – even the kids.  Where is all of this coming from?  I really don’t know but I will say someone is benefiting from this fright fest.

It’s important to keep focused on certain beliefs.   No matter what you think, God or the Universe is always in control.  We definitely have more power than we think.  Not just the power of voice but our own personal power.  Now a days, we are allowing the ideas of certain people to inhabit our consciousness.  We have to use our time wisely and prevent these illusions from poisoning our minds.  I know this sound simplistic but we all have to take time to go inside ourselves.  Meditation or prayer whatever you want to call it -try it.  I know for sure that the answers we seek are all inside of us.  The bible says we were wonderfully made.  That is very true.    Humanity is resilient, strong, and we all deserve good things.  Act like it and fight for your freedom to be more than just zombies or robots that just move through life expecting heartache, pain, and confusion.   During the Bus Boycott.  The people in those days believed in their destiny to be treated equally.  It took almost three years but they finally got the freedom they fought for.  They beat a system that was designed against them. Let’s teach out kids to fight for their futures.  Not turning it over to a couple of big mouths with a morbid agenda. Spend quality with your family and inculcate valuable life affirming values.  Don’t be fooled by the illusion of lack.  This earth was created to support life – all life. Pictures provided by Google. 

Sigrid

Feed The Children

As a teacher you observe many things.  I also tutor children and adults.  One issue I would like to address is making sure your child is totally ready for the educational experience.  I notice on many occasions my students come to class very hungry.  In fact, sometimes they are starving.  Some don’t have enough of a snack and others don’t have snacks at all.  First, children who come to class with a snack are ready to learn.  They can focus, participate, and think critically because they are not hungry.  When they are hungry, they can only concentrate on when they will eat their next meal.  Another words, their thinking ability is shot.  It may sound dramatic but I sometime see the hunger biting at them.  They cry a little or push their fists into their stomachs.  They start watching the clock becoming miserable and irritable.  Second, when a child is hungry I find that the lesson is a waste of time.  If your child cannot concentrate on the lesson how will they learn the skills being taught?  Thinking burns a lot of energy. Studies have shown that children with poor nutrition can experience cognitive problems.  Food is one of the factors that fuel the body and mind.

 I have literally heard parents say “wait until after tutoring session and I’ll get you something.”  That is a big mistake.  Usually that happens because the parent is running late and does not want to cheat the child out of tutoring time.     Last, a child who eats nutritious meals will make better food decisions in the future.  We learn our food habits when we are children.  Obesity and diabetes are on the rise with today’s youth.  Helping them learn from the beginning will help them make more informed nutritional choices for their future.  So next time your child is going to tutoring or school, make sure they have a nutritious snack.  It will make the educational experience for child, mom, and teacher a pleasant one.

Sigrid

Several studies have found effects of hunger and poor nutrition on cognitive ability. One such study found that among fourth grade students, those who had the least protein intake in their diets had the lowest achievement scores (ASFSA, 1989).

A laboratory study that involved healthy, well-nourished school-aged children found a negative effect of morning fasting on cognitive performance. A test of the speed and accuracy of response on problem-solving tasks given to children who did or did not eat breakfast found that skipping breakfast had an adverse influence on their performance on the tests (Pollitt et al., 1991).

Children who are hungry or undernourished also have more difficulty fighting infection. Therefore, they are more likely to become sick, miss school, and fall behind in class.

http://ericdigests.org/1994/nutrition.htm

 

 

                                                      Moms and Dads......Relax

This is the time of year when children are going back to school.  A great joy for some and agony for others.  Everybody is nervous about what the new school year will bring.  Teachers thinking about how they will meet the criteria and help the children succeed.  Parents wanting their children to have a successful year and the students hoping to pass all of their classes.  I want to wish everybody a happy and successful new school year and ask the parents to.........relax a little.

If you are stressed out, the kids will feel it and be stressed out.  When you are under duress you cannot perform at your ultimate best.  Try to give the kids balance.  Hard work and some play will help your child have a better attitude when they come back to school.  The education process will not be a boring chore if they have an outlet.  I say this because I cannot believe how many parents keep their kids in school, homework sessions, and then marathon tutoring sessions - back to back.  Their minds need rest and they need to associate with their peers.  This is also a part of the educational process.  Go to the bookstore and let your kids look at some of the books.  Occasionally, a nature drive will do everybody some good.  We want everybody to be able to help with the educational development of the children.  So moms and dads....relax.

 

Follow your Heart

I was listening to a parent talk to his child about her future.  She wanted to be an artist and he wanted her to have a career in technology.  She was dead set against his choice for her.  When she was a little girl, I remember him telling me how artistically gifted she was.  Now all of a sudden it was not good enough.  She tried to explain that she would not be happy with his choice for her.  She could not find anything passionate about his choice.  He argued she will never be out of a job and will make great money.  That was not enough for her.

 I understand her point.  How many people study this and become that?  How many people actually use the degree they worked hard and paid for?  Ask some of your friends and colleagues.  How many use their degrees?  Many do not.  That is sad unless it is by choice.  How many people are miserable in their choice of career er job.  Now it’s only a job because you get up, get dressed, go to work and come home.  Where is the passion?  Most people I know have settled for a job instead of the career they originally wanted.  It is sad.  They look miserable. How about those who have “a job” and a bad attitude.  We see this everywhere.  Think about someone like Vera Wang.  I’m sure she has her bad days but I bet nothing can compare to the fact that she gets up every day doing what she loves to do best.  Joel Osteen the same story.  I actually know people who studied for a career and are working in their chosen industry.  Some are making great money and some are making a decent salary.  Do you know what I notice about these people?  Big money small money did not matter.  They are generally happier than those who compromised.

We compromise for different reasons.   Life circumstances can change in an instant and alter our path.  But let’s not let go of our dreams.  If your career choice is still nagging you, look at your life and see how you can make changes.  You may be surprised.  You may be able to find your way back because of your life and job experiences.  There may be an unconventional path back to your original plan.  Life is short and full of surprises.  Go for it!  Getting back to my original story, I talked to her father and reminded him of what he said years ago.  He agreed.  I told him if she followed her heart the money would follow.  Well now we are in the let’s see phase.  Always strive to follow your heart.  The universe will take care of the rest. 

Sigrid Channer

 

Parents, Keep It To Yourself

It’s funny.  As an educator you see and hear so many interesting things.  Sometimes all it takes to make a positive difference is a parent who really wants their child to excel.  If there is a problem and the teacher comes to you, whether you believe it or not, at least hear the teacher out.  You may learn something about your child you never knew.  Or you may find out something about the teacher you should know.

 Years ago I knew a teacher who really wanted to make a difference.  I know many great teachers but I’m making a point with this particular teacher.  She was having problems with three students in her class.  She went through all the appropriate channels to get them resolved.  She talked to the students themselves, administrators and parents. All to no avail.  She received no help from administrators and no cooperation from parents.  The bad behaviors escalated as the year progressed.  Finally, I heard something interesting.  One of the students was telling another student how her parents hated the teacher and wanted to beat up the teacher. The student was speaking in a passionate way.   Ah ha!  Obviously, I don’t know the whole story but now I realized why this student was carrying on a war campaign with the teacher, she heard what mom said.  Maybe I am wrong but I do know that this hate campaign was being fueled by mom’s anger at the teacher

Parents, ask any teacher, your kids bring their home issues to class very often.  What you say or do at home does not always stay at home – TRUST ME.  Private, intimate, illegal, damaging information comes right to the classroom.  I had a student not too long ago who had an issue with me.  Not at first, but after I met mom the student/teacher relationship went downhill.  He later admitted to me mom did not like me.  I saw him a year later and he greeted me warmly.  I don’t know what changed, I’m just glad it did.  His mom and I did not have any disagreements.  So I don’t know what that was about but it came to the classroom and made problems when there should not have been any problems at all.

Parents, if you don’t like your child’s teacher share that information with anyone except the child.  It can be detrimental to the child’s educational experience.  Talk to the teacher, believe it or not, we love to see parents.  You may be able to resolve the issue before it gets out of hand.  Your child’s coming to school should be a great experience for parent and child. 

 

 

Poor Reading Habits Start at Home

As a teacher I am fascinated by the fact that not only do I teach, but I learn as well.  My students teach me about myself and how to be a better teacher. When I am making my lesson plans I think about my students.  I ask myself “how can I make the lesson interesting or am I reaching the students?”   I also wonder how much of the information they will remember for the future.   Certain things stand out in my mind as I teach my students and talk to parents.  One thing is that my students learn their reading habits from their parents. 

I have found that if a parent does not like to read, most likely the child will not like to read.  Over and over parents admit they don’t like to read.  How can you motivate a child to read if you do not like to read?  Parents, your children may not be listening to you but they sure are watching you.  Once, at a reading conference the speaker said that kids like to be read to.  I asked if that were true for high school students.  The speaker said yes.  I started reading to my high school students and lo and behold they actually listened.  They loved it.  I still love being read to.  I also, of course, love reading.  In my house growing up we had a mountain of books in a variety of subjects.  My parents were veracious readers.  So were my brothers and sisters. 

Parents, if you want to encourage your child to read, it would help if you started the ball rolling.  Start finding things that interest you and talk about it with your children.  Also read to your children and start as young as possible.  If you can, make it a before-bedtime ritual.  Your children will enjoy the time and will remember it forever – so will you.   If there are older siblings encourage them to play word games. 

Helen Keller loved reading.  She said she would touch her parents, feel the book they were holding and feel their lips moving.  She would do this too not knowing why they were doing it.  Finally, when Anne Sullivan came and explained the process to her, Helen wanted to learn to read.  She learned braille and became an avid reader.  I tell you this is not accident.

These are just a few suggestions on this subject.  It is very interesting topic and I will  revisit this subject in the future. 

Sigrid Channer

 

Sometimes, it really is better to give than to receive

 I like how I feel when I give something to someone and they appreciate it.  Especially if the random act of kindness is unexpected.  I love to see the reaction they give me when they receive an unexpected gift.  If someone asks me for a favor and I can give, I do.  Why Not?  I can never understand what people get out of withholding a favor.  If you have the power to give - just give.   I have a friend right now who is withholding a favor from me because she cannot get anything from it.    Guess what?  All kinds of things are being withheld from her now, as we speak.   Everyone can see it but her.   Sometimes a smile is all that is needed.  Giving does not have to require a monetary obligation. 

I’m not saying to walk around giving compliments and selflessly doing nice things every minute of the hour.  The only point here is sometimes a gesture or kind word will go a long way to help make someone’s day better.

 

Sigrid

 

 

 

Enjoy Summer With The Kids

In summer things tend to be more relaxed.  I think it’s a great time to connect or reconnect with family or friends who we lose contact with throughout the year.  I see some families going on vacation, visiting loved ones, or just enjoying their time with the kids closer to home.  I think that’s great.  But I notice there are other parents who want to help their kids so much they lose sight of what is really important.  Time spent with them.

 Even though it may not seem like it, we don’t have all the time in the world with our kids.  Out time with them is finite.  One minute they are children the next, they are off to college and on with their adult lives.  Some parents are placing their children in day camp, summer school and other activities all summer long.  As far as I am concerned, that is a continuation of the grinding school year. Recently, I questioned a group of third graders and asked them the best time they ever had in life - period.  Every one of them talked about time spent directly with family.  They all talked about specific times spent with family members.   They talked about what made these times special and they spoke about these times fondly.  When they are 100 years old they will never forget the time spent with uncle Joe, Frank, Mike, Nick etc. 

It’s ok to send your child to summer school for academic enrichment or day camp to be with friends but let’s also take time to be with the children. Building memories and creating character.

Moms and Dads - Ain't Misbehavin

Today I witnessed something interesting.  Usually when a child is misbehaving, you will see the parents trying to address the situation in a manner that they hope will minimize the situation.  Sometimes the child gets embarassed and sometimes the parent gets embarassed.  Today I saw a parent out of control and the child embarassed.  A woman was coming to the park to pick up her daughters.  An older sibling was already there and they were waiting for their mother.  The mother came into the park yelling and screaming at a passing car.  They got into a yellling match on the highway and brought it to the park.  When the children saw their mother screaming, they became scared - even the older ones.  They raced over to their mom.  The mom apologized to all the other moms in the park and explained the situation.  Everybody was quite.  The kids were scared and admitted it out loud to each other.  You can tell they were also very embarassed. 

Sometimes unforseen circumstances present itself and we react in an undignified way.  Ok, it happens to all of us.  Unfortunately, sometimes the kids have to witness this.  I guess we have to learn to let somethings go so as not to embarass or scare our loved ones.  Mothers, Dads, next time a stranger acts like a jerk and the kids are near.....try to ignore it.  It can show the kids that it is not always wise to react to someone who is unreasonable or out of control.  The kids can see that there is another way to respond to an unkind or thoughtless act.  Being reactive can get us in a lot of trouble. 

Have You Checked The Children?

One evening I came home and found a group of boys in a group talking quietly and smoking pot.  They were 13-15 years of age.  It was 10:30 at night.  I wondered,  “ where are these parents?”  “Aren’t they  worried about their children?”  When I went upstairs I heard two rounds of gunfire.  The gunfire was powerful and I wondered if the parents thought about where their sons are.  Maybe the parents did not even hear the gunfire.  I hoped the kids were ok but I also thought about why these youngsters were out so late unsupervised and smoking pot in the open courtyard without a care in the world.     

Another evening I saw a very large group of boys and girls, again preteens, smoking pot.  This was a boisterous group.  All I could literally see is a pot filled haze of young people tumbling all over each other and smoking pot.  Some of the boys and girls were hanging all over each other.  Some of the girls were sitting in the boys lap and the boys were rubbing their thighs – preteen kids!  If mom came downstairs and saw this what would be her reaction?  This took me back to a news story I saw about an 11 year old that was fatally shot in a basketball court at 4am.  His mother was, of course, crying.  I wondered how she could let her child stay out so late. 

I am a teacher.  My preteen students come to school tired often enough.  When I ask them why, they say they were “hanging out.”  They admit they are out until 3 or 4 am.  If you really love and care about your child, why are they out until 4am?  What can happen to anyone who is constantly on the street until the wee hours of the morning?  How can your child function in school with so little sleep?  I have found that the children who stay out late and are unsupervised are the students who have the most academic problems.  Who is raising your child?  Being a parent is the most important job I know.  Children do not come with instruction manuals.  One false move and your child can be gone forever.  This is the case no matter what kind of parent you are. No matter how intelligent, what kind of judgement can an inexperienced unsupervised preteen have?  So why increase the odds of endangering your child by letting the streets raise him/her? 

Children need structure, love, and a strong foundation.  They will not get that in the street.  Who will protect your child from the elements in the street.  Nobody will protect or care for your child better than you can.  Being a parent is not a right but a privilege.  Children are not mini adults.  They need to be nurtured, protected, and guided.   I have seen, first hand, how these kids try to make their way in the world.  A world where they are exposed to dangerous adult situations and they have to make decisions based on their limited knowledge of the world.  Unfortunately they are not equipped mentally or emotionally to make a sound decision and they have no adult to help them.  So they make it with their limited knowledge of how the world works.  Then they have to pay a penalty.  These students risk the chance of being caught in the clutches of a predator.  This predator prey’s on a child who is hungry to do what is right but gets caught up with the wrong person who will lead them to a path of despair.

 Others are fortunate enough to find someone who is willing to take the time to help them.  They are the lucky ones.  I have seen these students.  They are hungry to find an adult who will help them navigate life’s tricky waters. Funny, I have seen even “half baked” adults step in and try to help.  A child knows when an adult is sincere.  They will follow this adult because they know at least this person cares about them.  That will go a long way in a child’s life.  An adult with a good heart but not enough life experience is better than nobody.  But, personally, I think the parent is the best person for the job.  Do you know where your kids are?  Your answer should be yes, of course.  These thought are just the first of many to come.  I think this is an important issue we should all get behind.

 

 

Mothers Day

There are not enough words to express what Mothers Day means for many  people.  I think of my mother.  I have been watching her closely for as long as I can remember.  Watching her every move and facial expression.  I dont think moms realize how closely we watch them. I remember seeing her happy for me, angry at me and the worst of all dissapointed in me.  I always watched how hard she worked and how she never complained.  My mother is in a nursing home now and I miss her more than ever.  She used to love to hear my silly stories about my day or some trouble a friend was  having.  We laughed a lot.  Our favorite passtime was shopping.  We could shop til the cows came home. 

We used to talk about all the things we were going to do and guess what?  Time ran out!!!  We did travel quite a bit and go to shows, exhibitions, lectures and fairs.  Funny, I can still think of a thousand things we promised to do and did not.  I found out two years ago she always wanted to go to New Orleans.  I did not know that.  I wish I did.  The moral of this story is to look at your mom, really look at her and ask what is in her heart of hearts.   If I could do it over again I would have traveled with my mom on at least two over the top trips.  One would be you-know-where and the other place we would pick together.  It would be some place that would take us out of our comfort zones for sure.  Remember to stay in the moment with mom and enjoy every moment.

I love you mom and thanks so much for everything.